I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I'm both gender and math confused
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
