How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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