How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
We left the knife in your bed.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
You tried to prove you weren't drunk by loudly singing the romanian national anthem. Why the fuck do you even KNOW the romanian national anthem?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize
