ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
