Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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