just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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