ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
