I hate your face
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
Randomize