Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
