Well douche your snatch and let's go!
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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