I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Randomize
