that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Randomize
