Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
Randomize
