love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Randomize
