No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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