I just made out with a guy for $7.
I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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