Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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