i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
