Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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