Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
