i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
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