moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
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