If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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