My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Are my feet made of real feet?
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Randomize
