I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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