You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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