i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
