whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
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