I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
