1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I just forgot I was standing up.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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