fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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