Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
so i finally decided to ask her out. she started mumbling, then she puked on me. i think i'll try again when she's sober
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
