So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Randomize