He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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