Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
