then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
