Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize