I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize
