I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
So much Jack, so little girl.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize