My nipple is on Facebook.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
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