East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Randomize
