I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
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