you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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