In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize