So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize