i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
