i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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