i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Randomize
