He is such a slut. More and more my type.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Randomize
