you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
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