11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Randomize
